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If you're looking for a steamy read, long, short or in between, where the characters are all over each other, get down and dirty, than I can guarantee that you will find something here. I'm going to level with you, my erotic romances are explicit and graphic in nature, but they all have happily forever or happily for now endings.


Enter at your own risk!


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TORY RICHARDS

Erotic Author

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

BDSM

We have a special guest with us today and she blogs about a special topic. Some of you may find it very interesting, while others may find yourselves getting uncomfortable. That's okay. The topic is about BDSM, something I don't write. Heck, I still have to google, what does BDSM stand for? LOL But I've been interested in learning a little more about bondage, discipline, dominance, submission, sadism and learning something new doesn't hurt. Please welcome Trillium and ask questions if you have one!

Would you allow someone to tie you up and flog you? More importantly, would you find that so sexually arousing that the mere touch of his or her hand would bring you to orgasm?

Or would you be able to kneel in a corner, content, waiting for someone to briskly tell you what to do, which might be balancing the checkbook, cleaning the silverware or servicing your master or mistress with your tongue?

Perhaps you might find it strange to control the moves of another human being, even to the point of putting them in a cage every night as a sign of your respect and love.

A wide variety of activities and commitment levels make up the BDSM scene. A couple, or a group in polyamourous relationships, can agree to play together, touching, tickling, using vampire gloves, whatever torment they can think up, but there’s no long-term commitment. At the other end are people in a committed lifestyle arrangement.

Why? Are these people sick? Are they looking for something they should have gotten growing up? The truth is sometimes that’s the case and anyone entering the BDSM scene for the first time needs to be on guard against people who are working out their issues on other people. (My story, The Awakening, deals with this problem.)


For some, the pain is an aphrodisiac. If it isn’t for you, that’s fine, but pain releases endorphins in some. It’s just the way they’re wired. And some gain endorphins from inflicting pain, seeing their partner writhe both in pain and pleasure as a result of their actions. The giving and receiving of pain begins to transcend the physical actions and the “players” can develop a tight bond that enhances the orgasm when it arrives (which may the dominant may forbid the submissive to have until the next day). It’s this heightened awareness of their unity that provides many couples with a glimpse of their own personal nirvana.

Have you ever gotten pleasure when you’ve deferred to another person, particularly someone you loved? Seeing your lover intent on a car chase in a movie, knowing it wasn’t your first choice, can intensify the flame of love inside you. What if you push your lover to do something outside his or her comfort zone and you have the joy of watching them master something they never thought they could do?

Push the envelope a bit and you have the intense emotion between two people who’ve agreed to trust each other enough to have new, if sometimes painful, experiences to achieve new heights of pleasure and communication. In the BDSM scene this is called “Power Exchange.” Done right, the BDSM experience helps each person in the relationship grow, come to terms with themselves as they really are and achieve new levels of relationship.

Not everyone gets to this point. Sometimes a person stumbles and a relationship crumbles. But like every powerful, strong relationship, the people who make it work are those willing to over-communicate, take a risk and continue their own personal growth.

The characters in all my novels have to achieve some growth in order to get the relationship they want. Sometimes they have trauma in their background, sometimes they don’t--kind of like the rest of the world. My latest book, Tuxedos and Corsets, brings together two people who already have experience in the BDSM scene, but need to learn to trust and work together, even though neither is ready to fall head-over-heels in love with the other…yet.

Trillium writes BDSM-oriented male/female erotic romance and mystery. Her website is www.trillium-author.com.


3 comments:

Trillium said...

Thanks for having me! Please leave a comment or a question!

Leni said...

I'm glad to have this introduction to your work and have just signed up to receive your newsletter.
The part about people working out their issues on others caught my attention because it really gives insight into the characters.
Looking forward to reading your work.

Trillium said...

Nice to hear from you Leni and glad you'll be part of my circle. Working out our issues with others, particularly those in our close relationships is true in real life, too. That's why it makes the characters more interesting -- you're right!