Sunday, September 25, 2011

25 things you don't need after you're 50

1. The three-dozen-egg carton, the 2,000-pack of Sweet'N Low and the Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar-size ketchup.

2. Super-sized fries (no one in the minivan to take the last handful, or take the edge off the guilt).
What guilt?

3. The minivan. How about a snazzy car, a smart car, even a wiseguy car?
Then what would you haul the grand kids around in?

4. A brand-new model four-over-four house — even on the golf course. Even if your kids live next door. Especially if your kids live next door.
Totally agree! Small is better. Less is more:)

5. A one-horse open sleigh. Yes, you've been meaning to get the horse but …

6. A Costco membership. You'll never need that many paper towels, unless you run a car wash. You'll never need that much toilet paper unless you run … out.

7. The gym ultra-membership. How about the dog, the shoes, the SPF 50 and the open road?
Or cruise ship.

8. Those seven, nine or 20 unfinished quilts and birdhouses. This makes me think of my mom. She was always quilting or making something. I have her quilts folded on a blanket chest that's filled with the afghans she crocheted. It was something she loved doing.

9. All those teaspoons, fruit spoons, salt spoons, cheese knives, crab picks and lobster crackers liberated from the restaurant along with the extra lemon, the fistful of sugar bags, the basket of rolls.
This is my hubby.

10. Fourteen matching place settings … 14 unmatched place settings are more fun, funky and functional.
This is me:)

11. Just one extra shot — tequila, espresso, Botox.
Just one?

12. Your very own chickens (really, really not).
LOL, I have a good friend who has chickens! She's the kind of person who has a garden every year and cans her own food. The chickens were going to cut down on the cost of eggs and meat. I think by now she's given them all names.

13. Four-inch heels for the wedding reception.
I have trouble in one-inch heels!

14. Another cat.
I disagree with this one. If I had the room I'd have more than three.

15. Another hat. Not even red?

16. Another hobby.
Disagree. You can never have enough hobbies! That's what makes life fun.

17. A bigger flat screen.
What, who has 20/20 vision after 50?

18. A bigger boat.

19. A bigger mortgage.
Hopefully your mortgage is paid off or close to it.

20. More than 700 channels in one night.
OMG! So true. Admit it, you only watch the weather channel and maybe a couple others.

21. More than 700 calories in one hand.
Depends on what you're holding:)

22. Double cheese.
Makes everything better!

23. 3-D.
Ok, thought this was a bra size at first.

24. Four-wheelers.

25. Quintuplets.


LuAnn said...

And, ya know, no matter how many channels you have, there still isn't anything on the darn thing!

tammy ramey said...

love the list! i'm still laughting so hard i can barly type. :)

marybelle said...

This was fun. I kept nodding my head!!

traveler said...

It made me happy today.

Tory Richards said...