Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Be Careful Out There...


We had to have the garage door repaired. The Sears
Repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did
Not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener. I
Thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one
Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head
And said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 h horsepower.' I
Responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4. He said, 'NO,
it's not.' Four is larger than two.'

We haven't used Sears repair since.


My daughter and I went through the McDonald's
Take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill. Our total
Was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter. She said,
'you gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes I
Know, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill
Back.' She sighed and went to get the manager who asked
Me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the
Quarter, and said 'We're sorry but they could not do
That kind of thing.' The clerk then proceeded to give me
Back $1 and 75 cents in change.

Do not confuse the clerks at McD's.


I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new
Neighbor call the local township administrative office to
Request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road.
The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars out
Here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be
Crossing anymore.'

From Kingman , KS.


My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a
Taco. She asked the person behind the counter for
'minimal lettuce.' He said he was sorry, but they
Only had iceburg lettuce.
From Kansas City


I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an
airport employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your
baggage without your knowledge?' To which I replied,
'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'
He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we

Happened in Birmingham , Ala.


The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe
to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually
challenged coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the
buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people
when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, 'What on
earth are blind people doing driving?!'

She was a probation officer in Wichita , KS


At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker.
She was leaving the company due to 'downsizing.' Our
manager commented cheerfully, 'This is fun. We should do
this more often.' Not another word was spoken. We all
just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights

This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.


I work with an individual who plugged her power strip
back into itself and for the sake of her life, couldn't
understand why her system would not turn on.

A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office, no less.


When my husband and I arrived at an automobile
dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had
been locked in it. We went to the service department and
Found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the drivers
side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I
Instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it
Was unlocked. 'Hey,' I announced to the technician,
it's open!' His reply, 'I know. I already got
that side.'

This was at the Ford dealership in Canton ,Mississippi


They walk among us... And the scary part is that they


Vicky said...

The second to the last one sounds like something I would do, just because I wasn't paying attention.

ann marie said...

Thanks for the laugh, it is the perfect ending to a bad day.

Nancy Bristow said...

Debbie...Since we can't eliminate idiots it's good that we can laugh....Nancy:)

Debbie Wallace said...

Vicky, I can relate to anything that has to do with numbers because numbers and I don't get along! I hated math in school.

Debbie Wallace said...

I'm sorry you had a bad day, Ann, hopefully it's behind you now. Glad my post was able to give you a chuckle. They always say, laughter is the best medicine.

Debbie Wallace said...

I agree totally Nancy!