Saturday, September 27, 2008

The Day the Penis asked for a Raise

I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

I do physical labor.
I work at great depths.
I plunge headfirst into everything I do.
I do not get weekends or public holidays off.
I work in a damp environment.
I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation.
I work in high temperatures.
My work exposes me to contagious diseases.

Sincerely, P. Niss

The Response.....

Dear Penis:

After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:

You do not work 8 hours straight.
You fall asleep after brief work periods.
You do not always follow the orders of the management team.
You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations.
You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working. You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing.
You will retire well before you are 65.
You are unable to work double shifts.
You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed the assigned task.

And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags.

Sincerely, V. Gina


Ellory said...

This brought a smile as I read it.

ReadingIsSoMuchFun said...

OMG! This had me cracking up. I have to share this one thanks for a good laugh heehee.


Tara W said...

This is too funny. LOL.

Debbie Wallace said...

Me, too! It was too cute not to post.

Debbie Wallace said...

Anytime Linda! By the way, did you notice anything on my blog? Maybe you should read it over carefully, from top to bottom...

Debbie Wallace said...

Glad you liked it, Tara.

ReadingIsSoMuchFun said...

Debbie I have saw the surprise message heehee. Thanks so much. Should I email you? You can email me if you like either way lol.


Nancy Bristow said...

LMAO. Bravo Debbie...a very good one....Nancy:)

Debbie Wallace said...

I thought you might like it, Nancy:)

Ruby (Mouth) said...

LMAO!!!! And my hubby thought it was funny too. He is a good sport!!

Debbie Wallace said...

You showed it to your husband? Too funny Ruby! LOL

ArkieRN said...

I love it! LOL