Sunday, June 29, 2008

I feel like today is Saturday but I know it's not. Yesterday is a blur to me and by the time I got home last night I was exhausted. Barely enough gumption left to get a much needed shower and collapse on the sofa for some TV before bed. Luckily we stopped for a Big Mac, two for $3.00, for dinner. Now, that's a cheap meal:)

I missed sci-fi Saturday but got to spend the day with three of my favorite people, my daughter, niece and granddaughter. We met at my dad's house to pack up the things he wants to take to North Carolina with him, and have a yard sale of the things he doesn't want to take. Kind of killed two birds with one stone. We spent the whole day there. And we took in more money than we thought we would, which he can use for the move.

My dad is moving to North Caroline to live with my sister and her husband. He can no longer live alone and for the last month has been staying with long time friends in another part of North Carolina. He loves it there and I can tell when we talk on the phone that the change has been very good for him. He's gone fishing again, something he loves but hasn't been able to do in the last few years.

Apparently his friends of forty years live in a nice area where there's mountains, lakes and lots of mother nature. Dad said they've made him feel very welcomed and comfortable. They've generously offered for him to stay with them but my sister has built on an addition to her home, so sometime in July he'll move on to her place.

I can hear it in his tone that he'd like to stay with his friends. They're his age and have a lot more in common. I told him to think about staying with his friends a few months a year, with Lois and Russ a few months and then come back to Florida during the winter and stay with me. It's a thought. One that might make everyone happy.

The main thing is for dad to be happy and to begin living again. Getting him out of the house he and my mom shared for so long was a start. In July she'll have been gone a year. It was a hard decision but one we had to make.

Yesterday was a lot of work but when the three of us girls get together we always have a good time no matter what we're doing. Little Alivia couldn't do much but she was so cute trying. I'm still tired, my back aches, but I feel satisfied that we accomplished what we set out to do.


Adamgv said...

Very good blog. I wish you much success.

Debbie Wallace said...

Thanks! I'm working at it:)

braible said...

Wow Deb, so glad you had fun! And so very sorry about your mom. I just lost mine two years ago in September. So I feel for you. We have the same issues with both my dad and my mother's last living sister. So my brother has my dad adn I have our aunt. I wish we could get him to go see any friends, that would be so good for him. So glad you're dad's getting to spend that time with his friends. I hope he does split the time. That would give him some events to look forward to!
Good thoughts heading your way!

Debbie Wallace said...

Sorry to hear about your mom too, Becky. My mom and I had our problems but it was still hard losing her.

I know it's not easy taking care of an elderly relative. I went to Maine and took care of my real dad the last 4 months of his life. The rest of the family wanted him to go to the veterans hospital to die but he wanted to die at home so I was determined he would. I'm so glad he did.

We do those things because it's the right thing to do, not the easiest. But I'll tell you this, I would do it all over again.

braible said...

I would too. I know what you mean about your mom, my mom and I had issues too. But I am so glad I did!! I wouldn't change it for anything. And now that I;m not working and my dad has cancer, I'm taking him to the doctor at least once a week. It's far and takes up the whole afternoon, but I get to see him every week during this battle. I;m really glad I can do it! And I'm so glad you took care of your dad so he could stay at home. That is wonderful. You know I was really sad one time when my mom was sick. She had to go to a nursing home for rehab and we were there every day. The nurses there told us that's very rare. Most patients have very few visitors. How sad is that?

Debbie Wallace said...

To sad to think about. They say when a patient has regular visitors they receive better care.

I had an aunt who was placed in a nursing home and my uncle went to see her every day for years before he died. Half the time she didn't know him or anyone else, but he was devoted to her.

I'm sure your dad is thankful he has you right now and that you're able to help him when he needs it. And I know it makes you feel good that you can.

braible said...

You are so right! I believe people do get better care. And I am very glad we are able to take care of him at home rather than a nursing home!!
And how cool for your uncle to be so devoted! I really respect that!